There is an unwritten rule that when you are stopped by the cops or questioned by the cops about how much you have had to drink, you lie. But you don't just lie, that's childish, there is a sophisticated formula. If you have had 4 beers or less, you just cut the number in half. 5 to 9 beers and you just say 3. 10 to 16 beers and the rule of 4 kicks in which means you divide your drinks by 4 and give that number to the cop. Over 16 and you just mumble something and pray. The rule of 4 is trumped however if you are unable to walk, stand or you stop breathing on way to the hospital. In that case you have to throw in a bonus excuse, like one of the following, I didn't sleep last night. I was really sick all day. The doctor has me on the medications and so on. The more creative you are, the more the cops appreciate it.

Which brings us to Rose Adame, a 32 year old mother from Oklahoma who's toddler was seen wandering around their apartment complex with beer in his bottle. She does get points for sharing at least. When police arrived she was so wasted she could not stand and tried to wrest the bottle from her child for one last sip of the “baba” before nappy time.

The paramedics showed up to transport her to the hospital, she was unresponsive and actually stopped breathing in the ambulance. She must be fun to party with. At this point you are probably thinking she had a lot to drink that day, but then you would be forgetting the rules. She told the officers that she had been sick that day and drank about a dozen beers starting in the morning.

Hard to say how much she really had to drink, but as someone who on occasion enjoys a pint, my breathing has never stopped for 12 beers.

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